Victoria’s Read

New Years Eve

On New Year’s Eve, Judy stood up at the local pub and said that it was time to get ready.
At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living.  ……………………The bartender was almost crushed to death.

New Years Day

As in many homes on New Year’s Day, Janet and Nigel, a happily married couple, faced the annual conflict of which was more important: the football match on television or the lunch itself.

Hoping to keep the peace Nigel ate lunch with the rest of the family and even lingered for some pleasant after-lunch chat before retiring to the lounge to turn on the television.

Some minutes later, Janet looked in to see how he was and graciously even bought a cold beer for Nigel. She smiled, kissed him on the cheek and asked what the score was. Nigel told her it was half time and that the score was still 0-0.

‘See?’ Janet said happily, ‘You didn’t miss a thing.’